


Safe Travels

by Serenity59



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Character Death, Child Death, Good Rowena, Making peace, Motherly Rowena, Sad, coda season 14 episode 7, mentions of crowley - Freeform, season 14x07
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-09-02 20:23:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16794079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Serenity59/pseuds/Serenity59
Summary: Coda to season 14 ep 7: Rowena tries to save Jack, but nothing seems to work. Before the boys come storming in to try something else, Jack makes her promise something. He ends up spending one of the most important moments of his life with the most unexpected person, and gives her a priceless gift in return.





	Safe Travels

**Author's Note:**

> HAVE TISSUES READY!! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES THIS COMING??

_ This is a sad one! Enjoy! _

_ Maybe this is what dying feels like _ , Jack thought as he lay in the bed,  _ slowly starting to feel nothing at all.  _

The glow of the candlelit room was soft, and he turned his head to look at the red haired witch who sat idly beside him. 

“I want to thank you,” he rasped quietly so that no one else could hear, “for everything.”

Rowena glanced up at him, face tense for a moment before smiling nonchalantly. “You’ve nothing to thank me for, dear. Just ask Samuel. The lot of good I’ve done weighs a wee bit light compared to the bad.”

“I don’t think you’re bad.” Jack said lowly, staring at her through the dim lighting.

Rowena scoffed almost bitterly, turning away from the young nephilim. “Please, now. I’m a witch, dear, I used to worship your  _ father.  _ Bad doesn’t even begin to cover it. What else could I possibly be?”

There was a long pause between them, Rowena not expecting an answer as she tended to her spell items, the ingredients and potions that had been meant to save Jack but hadn’t worked. 

“A mother,” Jack whispered, and at that, the witch looked up at him in wide eyed surprise, “a mother,” he continued, “who lost a son… But was too afraid to be loved in return. So she lived the rest of her life alone, doing everything and anything she could to… to forget about it. But only when she lost him did she realize that she’d never stopped loving him at all.” 

Rowena couldn’t speak, eyes pained as watched the boy who she’d once thought deserved to die. She could only draw shallow breaths.

“... But in losing one son,” Jack gasped through a cough, “she gained another.” He reached out carefully, only moving inch by inch, before grabbing her hand. “And she will find herself again. Only this time, she won’t hate her. She’ll love her.” 

Rowena was afraid to move, fearing that any sort of motion would shatter the sort of trance he’d trapped her in with his words. She squeezed her eyes shut, feeling warm tears run down her cheeks. They just sat like that for a while, taking in each other’s company, not saying a word. It was a comfortable, warm silence. Eventually, she felt Jack’s grip begin to loosen and his breath begin to falter. She didn’t try to prolong anything, she already knew that was no use. She just stared at him sadly, hand never leaving his. 

“P-promise me,” he breathed, voice almost imperceptible, “promise me that you’ll burn my body. I don’t want them to try and bring me back. It’s my time… there’ll never be a better one. It’s what I want.”

Rowena was in awe at the peace and courage on the child’s face, and she found her voice frozen. All she could do was nod. “I promise.” She whispered truthfully, nodding, “I give you my word.” 

Jack smiled in relief, and a part of the witch grasped tighter onto his hand, as if trying to hold him back and keep him from leaving. She forced herself to remain calm, to stay and cradle his palm in hers. She locked eyes with him, never looking away until his eyelids began to slide shut. His grip on her disappeared, and she watched as he drew his last breath, and then… he was no more. She felt it, the moment his soul left for the afterlife. Then she was alone, all by herself in the empty room next to his cooling body.

And then, she found herself in shock at what was happening. For the first time in her entire life, she was crying  _ genuine happy tears.  _ She wasn’t bitter or resentful, just  _ emotions.  _ She could  _ feel  _ again. It had been so, so long since she could feel… And it was beautiful. 

She sat and cried, chest hitching in deep breathfuls of sobs until she could cry no more. She cried in sadness, because the boy was gone from them. She cried in gratitude, because in a way, she finally got a chance to say goodbye to her child. He’d given her an opportunity to  _ be a mother,  _ just one last time. That was something no one else could ever take away from her. She cried for her son, who she’d never gotten to know. She cried for her grandson, who she’d killed in her own selfishness, an act she’d regret until the day she died. And then… Then, she let them go. It felt like a ton of lead weight had been lifted from her chest, leaving her light and for the first time that she could remember, at  _ peace.  _ She would no longer owe anyone anything. She no longer had to hate herself for her past. She could finally let it  _ rest.  _

It was then that she opened her eyes, face still red and teary, and saw Jack lying peacefully on the bed. Sam, Dean, and Castiel were right outside, waiting. She knew they would hate her for this, but… That was okay. She was following through on her promise to the child, and nothing would stop her from breaking it. She refused to fail another son, drawing the sheet over his face and spelling them away to somewhere the boys wouldn’t find. 

* * *

  
  


The clearing of the Alaskan wilderness was peaceful and calm, beautiful trees and glistening rocky waterfalls framed the distant landscape. Rowena was alone, save for the birds and a few stray deer. She worked thoughtfully and silently, gathering nearby pieces of branches and longs, dried grass and twigs. She didn’t even notice as the sun began to set, as time seemed to blur together while she worked. She diligently and painstakingly placed every blade of grass and every log on top of one another, bordering the arrangement with rocks and small bouquets of wildflowers. 

When she was done, the first stars were beginning to shine in the sky. She climbed up the few steps to the pyre, where Jack’s body rested, placed gently as if he was sleeping. She smiled wetly at the young boy’s calm face. “Safe travels, dear.” She whispered, before covering him in the light bed sheet. She’d grabbed all of his earthly possessions before they left, ensuring that nothing left behind could be used to bring him back. She’d placed them carefully in neatly-bundled bags at his feet, his shoes, his clothes, and a small teddy bear that he’d had in his bedroom. They surrounded him as though they were suitcases for his journey. 

She lowered herself to the ground, walking back to the front of the pyre, before whispering a spell underneath her breath. A flame appeared in the palm of her hand, small and bright. She sighed deeply, knowing that there was no going back now. But that was ok. Even if none of the Winchester boys or their angels would never speak to her again, she would be ok with that. She could live the rest of her life knowing she’d done right by one child by making good on his promise. In a way, she almost felt like she was doing it for her son. 

She closed her eyes, using her powers to try and sense out the whereabouts of Sam and Dean. It took a lot of energy out of her now, more than it used to, but she could sustain the connection just long enough to hear their voices echoing panickedly throughout the bunker as they finally figured out what had happened.  _ “ROWENA!!!”  _ She heard Castiel’s screams of sorrow in the distance of her mind, along with boys’. 

Exhaling and opening her eyes again, she knelt to the ground and touched the flame to the trail of dried twigs and grass. The holy-oil soaked material went ablaze in seconds, and she took a few steps back and watched as the pyre lit up the night, giant flames leaping high into the sky as it caught ignition. 

She didn’t know if there was a real heaven or not. After everything she’d see and dealt with, she had all her doubts. But a small, almost insignificant part of her still held out the belief that there was. And if, by some non existent miracle that was true, she smiled at the fact that Jack would surely be there.

_ Let them hate me,  _ she thought peacefully,  _ I’ve done all I needed to do.  _


End file.
